Obviously yesterday was Mother’s Day in the United States. Personally, on holidays such as Mother’s and Father’s Day, Valentine’s Day, Thanksgiving, Christmas, etc, I love to go on social media because almost everything you see exudes love and positivity (with only a few exceptions)! There are only a few days like this out of the year, so I like to embrace them. On these days, people are actively sharing love and gratitude for loved ones. It’s a beautiful thing.
What we don’t see is the emotions behind the scenes. Mother’s Day seems to bring up lots those for people for all different reasons. We all have different relationships with our own mothers; I am so blessed and grateful to have my mom and be close with her. But some have a strained relationship with their mother, some have lost her, some never knew her. For some it’s difficult for other reasons such as losing a child, strained relationships with children, others it’s because they long to be a mother but their time hasn’t come yet. As many of you probably know, this is my personal struggle.
Sharing so openly about our struggle to have children when we want to be parents to much is a scary thing. It’s very personal and being vulnerable is uncomfortable (read this post about being vulnerable)! But so many wonderful things have come from it. One of the best things though is that we now have the most incredible support system. Friends and family have rallied around us, constantly sending prayers, good vibes, kind words, flowers, cards, and just love. And now that we have this ever growing beautiful group of people surrounding us and lifting us up, we know that our sweet babe (whenever and however he/she comes) will be loved beyond measure, not just by us and our immediate family but by a VILLAGE OF OTHERS. So thank you to everyone who has reached out to us and has made an effort, however big or small, to recognize us and this heavy trial, and bear it with us. You make it easier. We appreciate every effort more than we can ever express.
Particularly on this Mother’s Day, I received more love than I ever could have imagined in the form of texts, calls, DMs on Instagram, comments, cards, and even coming home from our trip to flowers!
Here are some of the kind words that I received (anonymous). If you’re struggling, I want you to take these words into your heart too:
- “…You are a light and bless people’s lives with that love! ❤️ Mother’s Day should be a celebration of those divine gifts that bless and serve others!!!”
- “…You are a great example of how to be not only a mother but how to be a good person!”
- “…I love you and think the world of you!.”
- “…I know today can be a bittersweet day, but know that I pray for you and look forward to the day you and your awesome husband have little ones! You’ll be an amazing mom.”
- “…Thank you for being such a wonderful mother figure to my kiddos and example to me in so many ways! You are amazing!”
These are just a few and I could not be more humbled and appreciative of these sweet words, and that sweet friends took time out of THEIR special day to share them with me. I know there are many who have this same struggle with infertility and aren’t as open about it as we are, so please accept these words from me and my tribe. YOU are appreciated and wonderful and cared for, and you are not alone.
Infertility is not an easy thing, but no trial ever is. We all have difficult things we’re facing in this life. And if you haven’t yet, you will. We weren’t promised smooth sailing in this life. I personally believe part of the purpose of our life here on earth is to face trials and learn and grow from them, they build us into the person we are meant to be.
For me, burdens are made lighter by enlisting the help of others. But trials are also made easier when you choose joy anyway. Life is still wonderful even with the bad stuff. Focus on the good and the blessings around you, I promise they are there.
And Happy (belated) Mother’s Day to all women who nurture, love, and care for others from the depths of their souls! YOU ARE SUPERWOMAN!
Oh, and I’m a Dog Mom to my sweet pup, and for now I’ll take it!
Adrienne Biehl 